By Her Bedside
by JoyScott13
Summary: As Coulson sits by Daisy's bedside he thinks back on the traumatic process of curing her of Hive's control, and the other times he's sat at her bedside, waiting for her to wake up after something terrible has happened, knowing that this time will the the hardest one yet.
Coulson sat by the side of her bed, quietly watching as she slept. She was home, safe and sound – physically at least. Daisy looked so much younger, and more vulnerable, in her sleep, and Coulson wished he could keep her from the harsh realisations that he knew her waking would bring.

It had been almost 48 hours since they'd cured Daisy of Hive's control, and Coulson had barely left her side since. Simmons had assured him that Daisy was in no danger, and that she would suffer no lasting ill effects – medically speaking that was. She was just sleeping it off, and she would wake once her body had had enough time to rest from everything it had gone through. They'd brought her back to her own room, and despite everything Coulson felt an overwhelming sense of relief that they'd managed to bring her home. For as long as she slept Coulson could pretend that everything was okay, and that they were all as peaceful as Daisy looked right now.

She hadn't looked so peaceful earlier though, when Lincoln and Simmons had administered the cure, combining his medical knowledge with her biochem specialisation. Simmons had insisted that it was important for the patient, for Daisy, to be awake throughout the process, and so they'd been forced to restrain her to the medical bed, with the inhibitors for her powers strapped securely to her arms. The atmosphere had been tense, with no one but Daisy willing to break the silence; the rest of them had just been determined to get through this. Fitz and Mack had stood behind the glass, looking into the medical bay, as though that physical barrier might give them some distance from what was happening to their friend inside. May had positioned herself between Daisy and the door, instinctively ready to deal with the situation if things went south. Coulson had found himself at the side of the bed, wishing he could say something to get through to Daisy, so she'd calm down and not hurt herself by resisting. Simmons and Lincoln had been working together to prepare the procedure, each avoiding looking at Daisy. Once she'd realised exactly what was happening, that they intended to free her from Hive, Daisy's struggles had intensified. Coulson could still hear the screams ringing in his ears.

First Daisy had tried pleading, insisting that she was happy as she was now, that she'd found where she truly belonged. Her eyes had filled with tears as she tried to persuade them that they were wrong, and that if they would just _wait_ they would all understand. Her pleas had turned desperate as she'd realised that no one was going to answer her, that they were not going to stop. It had cut Coulson to his core to hear her beg them not to take her away from her family, not when she'd finally found them after a lifetime of searching. ' _We're your family!', h_ e had so desperately wanted to shout, but he knew it would do no good. In this state, Daisy wouldn't be able to listen. Finally, with tears beginning to fall, Daisy had turned to anger. Anger at them for doing this to her, for disregarding her choices. _We weren't the ones to take away your ability to choose, your free will, in the first place._ Coulson had been forced to take a deep breath, feeling his robotic hand clench far too tightly. As it became clear that the procedure was almost ready to begin, Daisy had turned vicious in her anger, shouting and screaming at them, flinging perfectly targeted insults and accusations at each of them individually. Her words stung, hitting them all where they were weakest. Daisy would never say those things, she'd never even think them, but in her anger and desperation brought on by her fear of losing her connection to Hive, she had lost all control. Yet another thing Coulson knew would haunt Daisy later. _I hate you! I hate you all!_

The cure itself was relatively simple in its design. A single injection into the bloodstream of some substance Lincoln and Simmons had _tried_ to explain to Coulson, but as usual it had all gone over his head. From their simpler explanation he'd gathered that the serum would counteract the Hive parasite's infection, killing and destroying the parasite itself. They'd assured him that it wouldn't hurt Daisy beyond a brief discomfort, and Coulson had no choice to believe them. They all knew there was no alternative.

Lincoln had wanted to be the one to give her the cure, but when the moment came his hands had been shaking and sparking, and May had put a hand on his shoulder to silently let him know that it was okay if he couldn't do it. Simmons had picked up the needle instead, forcing a reassuring smile onto her face. Daisy had been oblivious to this exchange as she struggled against her restraints. But once she had noticed Simmons approaching with the needle, she'd gone still. Her eyes had locked with Coulson's, her anger falling away. He was sure that the look on her face and the sound of her voice _Please don't do this to me_ would fuel his nightmares forever. He'd taken her hand then, promising her that it would all be over soon, and that everything would be okay. He could only hope that those words hadn't been a lie.

If Coulson's heart hadn't already been shattered into a million pieces, Daisy's desperate screams of _No!_ as she felt the needle sink in and deliver the cure would have surely broken his heart. He hated seeing her in such pain, especially knowing that it was his order which had put her there. ' _We're helping her',_ he had told himself as he watched her struggle in vain, hoping with every fibre of his being that his hand in hers was providing her some level of comfort. Lincoln, a new look of determination clear on his face, had moved to her side and taken her other hand, before gently running his free hand over her hair in a soothing manner. The team had stood there in silence, watching Daisy struggle, listening to her increasingly incoherent screams, powerless to help. It had felt to Coulson like an eternity, but the clock on the wall showed it to have been only around 5 minutes before Daisy suddenly went still, her eyes slipping closed. The beep of her heart monitor had begun to slow to its usual inhuman rhythm, and Simmons had rushed to perform various tests and checks; Coulson had thought she seemed pleased to have something to do again. Lincoln had taken a few steps back, his face looking as drained and horrified as Coulson felt. He had mumbled something about wanting some air and had stumbled from the room, his hands sparking uncontrollably. Mack had followed, promising to make sure he was okay. Coulson hadn't been sure how any of them could be okay after what they'd just been through.

Lincoln and Mack had reappeared around the same time Simmons completed her tests, and announced with a small, tired smile that it had worked, and that Daisy was going to be fine; with the serum's help her body had fought the Hive parasite off. Lincoln had collapsed into a chair, while Mack lightly tapped the still sleeping Daisy on the shoulder _Good work Tremors!_

24 hours later they'd moved Daisy back to her room, so she'd feel more comfortable when she woke up, which Simmons said could be anytime now. And so Coulson had found himself sitting and waiting, watching as Daisy slept. He couldn't help but think back to all the other times he had sat by her bedside like this, keeping a silent vigil, waiting for her to wake up.

The first time had been after she'd been shot; she'd looked so small, and it had hit Coulson just how young and untrained she really was. His guilt at being the one to bring her into this life had been overwhelming, especially with the knowledge that Quinn had shot her on the Clairvoyant's orders, simply to get at him. First he'd sat there, not expecting her to survive, reliving the moment he found her bleeding out alone in that room. When he realised she'd pulled herself across the floor to try to reach to the door to get help he'd felt anger on a scale he'd never felt before. He could remember thinking how unfair it was that you often only realised how important someone was to you right before you lost them. So of course, he'd refused to accept that they would lose her. Then, once he'd been too late to stop Simmons from administering the GH-325, he'd sat by her bedside, confident that she would survive her gunshot wounds, but terrified about what the GH-325 might do to her instead – something else which would be his fault. Then it had been Skye – Daisy – 's optimism and hope that had calmed his fears; he wasn't sure that Daisy would still have that spark in her when she woke up, and that thought terrified him.

The next time he could remember waiting by her bedside for her to wake up, he'd been the other side of a quarantine glass. It was after the Kree temple, and Trip, and the city collapsing around her, and he had known how much pain she would be in when she awoke. And he'd been right, he'd watched her face fall as it all came rushing back. She'd assumed all the guilt for herself then, blaming herself for Trip's death, even though it hadn't been her intention in the slightest. Coulson gave a deep sigh as he realised just how similar this situation was to that one, only on a much graver scale. He hated Hive with every part of him, more than he'd thought was possible.

After the confrontation with Jiaying, Coulson had been in the bed next to Skye in the medical bay as he recovered from losing his hand, and she rested to overcome the effects of Jiaying, her own mother, trying to kill her. Coulson had held her while she cried, while she apologised for siding with Jiaying in the first place, how she hated herself for betraying Shield. He'd reassured her, told her that they all understood. And they did, just like they would this time. He'd held her as she cried for the loss of the parents she'd only just found, and as she wiped away the last of her tears he'd listened as she told him firmly that she wasn't going to be Skye anymore; she was going to be Daisy Johnson, the person she was supposed to be. All that pain had made her stronger, more determined to make a difference and to help people. She hadn't let it beat her. But Coulson couldn't help but wonder if there was only so much one person could take.

'Any change?' Coulson looked up to see Fitz standing in the doorway, snapping him from his train of thought. He shook his head, and Fitz nodded before continuing on his way. The others came by intermittently, sometimes staying for a while, other times just checking that everything was okay. They were all so concerned for Daisy, and it warmed Coulson's heart that she had such a supportive family – they were her true family – waiting to help her through what came next. There was one member of the team who had remained by her side from the start, along with Coulson, refusing to leave for longer than was absolutely necessary. Coulson shifted his gaze to Lincoln, who had fallen asleep from sheer exhaustion, with his head resting on the bed. He'd decided to let him sleep; the past few days had taken a toll on all of them. Lincoln deserved the rest. If he was honest, Coulson had started to think he'd maybe treated Lincoln a little unfairly. He'd been betrayed by so many people he'd once thought were trusted allies, it had made him extra cautious about Lincoln, especially given his past loyalty to Jiaying against SHIELD. And, he supposed, he'd been especially suspicious because of Lincoln's connection to Daisy; she'd been through so much already. But the more time he spent with the Inhuman, the more Coulson found himself respecting him. Lincoln was determined and dedicated, and while he had his flaws, he was willing to try to work on them. Coulson could see him shaping into a real agent, and he was glad Daisy had him at her side, and that Lincoln had Daisy. These past few weeks had shown him that Daisy could count on Lincoln, and Coulson knew that Lincoln would be there for Daisy in ways he never could be. And Daisy would need that, especially now.

'Coulson? What's going on?' Coulson's eyes snapped instantly from Lincoln to Daisy, who was looking up at him with a confused look on her face. This was it.

'Daisy? How are you feeling?' He asked tentatively, not entirely sure what to say, or what reaction he'd get from Daisy. At the sound of their voices Lincoln sat up, wide awake and alert, reaching for Daisy's hand.

'What do you remember?' Lincoln's voice was laced with worry, but Coulson thought he detected a sliver of hope there; hope that maybe Daisy wouldn't remember it at all, and wouldn't have to live with the memories. Daisy blinked a few times, before her eyes lost their focus, and she sat bolt upright in bed.

'Oh my god,' she whispered, and Coulson watched as her face crumpled just as he'd feared it would, 'I'm a monster.' Lincoln started to protest, to reassure her but she cut him off 'I am, I hurt innocent people. I hurt Fitz. I, I _killed_ people. I was willing to kill all of you. I'm a _monster_.' Her voice was full of disgust and guilt and self hatred and her eyes filled with tears.

'You're not, you're the farthest thing from a monster, I promise.' Coulson wished he could make her believe his words.

Lincoln nodded, adding 'It wasn't you, it was Hive, his influence. None of it is your fault.' Daisy just gave a hollow laugh, shaking her head as the tears began to fall.

'You don't understand, I _enjoyed_ it, I wanted to, I wanted to please him. I chose to do those things. How could I do that?' The room began to shake a little, and Lincoln placed a reassuring hand on her back.

'Hive infected you with a parasite, Daisy. It _wasn't_ you, not really." He tried to explain, but Daisy flinched back from his touch.

'You shouldn't come near me, I might hurt you. Like I hurt those people. You must all hate me.' Daisy's voice broke, but she spoke with such conviction and belief that she was a terrible person, and Coulson knew he would do anything to prove her wrong. As her breathing hitched and a sob escaped, he pulled her into a hug. She stiffened at first, but then she clung to him tightly, and he felt the shaking in the room subside, even as sobs wracked her body. He could make out some of what she was saying, _It's all my fault, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry_ and he held her tighter. Lincoln wrapped an arm around her too, whispering, _It's okay, it's not your fault, you're not alone, we're all here for you_.

Coulson wasn't sure how long they stayed like that, but he knew he wouldn't move from that spot for as long as Daisy needed him. When he felt her sobs starting to die down, Coulson finally trusted himself to speak.

'It'll all be okay, you haven't lost us. I promise. We'll get through this Skye, together.' Coulson hoped she felt the truth of his words. She mumbled something in reply, but he couldn't quite make it out. He looked at Lincoln questioningly.

'She said it's Daisy, sir, not Skye.' Lincoln managed a small smile, which Coulson returned.

'Daisy, right. Why can I never remember that?' He felt Daisy give a weak laugh through her tears, and felt a flicker of hope ignite in his heart. His Daisy, their Daisy, was still in there. They'd help her through this, support her every step of the way. He knew her, he knew she'd pick herself up and fight with everything she had, just like she always did. There was a long road ahead, but Daisy would find her spark again, and their family would be complete once more.

* * *

Hello! Hope you enjoyed that! I think it ended on a positive note! This was written before tonight's episode (S03E19 Failed Experiments) (I'm not 100% when I'll post this!), so I apologize if it deviates from what happens in that episode!

Also, I have no medical knowledge, but for this fic I didn't feel HOW they cured her was overly important, it was the emotional repercussions of the situation, so I made it a (fairly) simple solution...

Thinking about and writing scenarios where Daisy is safe and with the team is pretty much all that's getting me through this plotline!

Thank you to Sara for all your help with this and my last fic, and for inspiring me to get back into writing! :)


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